Its beginning to look a lot like the day after christmas

Guess what? Apparently in the winter time it gets cold and the rain turns to snow. Meteorology is so hard to predict, next they'll say its hotter in June than January - tis a conspiracy, i tell ye. Anyway, as a racing and footie fan, the weather has certainly put the skids under my armchair viewing and at the time of writing, my st Stephen's, which to be fair was looking shite, appears at best reduced and at worst decimated  by the weather.Now there is bog all that the horse tracks can do due to the logistics of defrosting a small farm but the footie needs to stop being pussies and start playing football.

The problem with the spate of postponements last week was that in the majority of cases there was either no reason given for the postponements or they used the new catch all of areas outside the ground being unsafe. Much as we wish clubs would tell the public to go fuck themselves- we will have to deal with this real bugbear of ours at some stage- its understandable that clubs dont want people slipping in the car park or having their arse stuck to the seats but as it actually occurred to anybody that fans really dont mind a little hardship- jesus if we did we'd all play canasta instead- as long as it's done with the best intentions. I would never yearn for a total pre-Hillsborough environment but it can go too far the other way as fans can get equally frustrated when being treated like a bunch of three-year-olds who need to be protected from everything in case they hurt themselves. What also makes last weeks situation bizarre are the games lower down the ladder that did get played. Seven games were played the championship, admittedly none further south than Coventry and one in League One at Exeter. What is of much more importance is who played where-QPR went to Leeds -175 miles; Bristol City went to Hull 183 miles; Swansea to Sheffield 160 miles and more importantly Sheffield Wednesday went to Exeter a distance of 202 miles-hells fuckin bells ICT went to Hearts 124 miles in Scotland. So why could these games go ahead when premiership games were called off- http://www.the90thminute.com/soccer/2010/12/all-epl-matches-on-sunday-december-19-2010-postponed-due-to-weather/ gives the reasons why sundays games were called off:  west bromwich to wolverhampton 7 miles- and the answer is we have no fucking idea

Of the games postponed only Arsenal indicated any sense that the state of the pitch was the primary reason for the game being called off. Even Blackpool, who dont have undersoil heating which we were under the impression was a pre-requisite for entry to the EPL, were more concerned about the state of the outside rather than the inside. The powers that be are clearly fearful in this litigious age to allow a large amounts of the public to descend on a particular area of a town or city in case there may be an accident-if it's to watch football. Surely, if it's too dangerous for thousands of people to attend a stadium, it must therefore be dangerous for any large group of people to gather anywhere in such conditions, like the shops or bus and rail stations or office complexes or rugby matches or football matches in Leeds or Exeter. While we believe that fans are allowed to be hypocrites and get away with murder, we also accept that fans are prepared to crawl over glass for their teams. It may be the most offensive thing to ever see but if fat geordies want to watch a match topless in a fridge and if the players are in no immediate danger, then play the fucking game. A lot of morons follow football but they are still the minority and no-one should assume that if the game goes ahead that fans will run headless to the ground without due care and attention. Some might even think it's bit nippy, the roads are lethal and ye know what i might listen to it on the radio. There was a lad on from Dundee who said that they had to pay out full match day costs even if the game is called off as was in their case due to a frozen pitch-so if the pitch isn't frozen what is the justification for calling off the game. we can but speculate $$$

The thing that we cannot grasp is literally at what point does responsibility for accidents in transit move from the traveller to the destination. Surely, its not the clubs fault if the local authority fails in its duties in making roads passable. By taking the decision to call off games more than 24 hours before kickoff, clubs let councils off the hook to a certain degree as they are not under as much pressure to get things done and its not as if the council rush to clear pathways because they are not going to be used. but its not as simple to say that councils dont want to be liable and thus health and safety goes into overdrive because then we would see the high streets closed. No, we feel that it reduces the options for clubs who want to get as many bums on seats as possible. If councils cant get their arses in gear to get roads gritted and pathways cleared then clubs would rather cancel and rearrange for a day when crowds can be got there in numbers rather than play in front of half empty stadiaEPL team following the example of Edinburgh Rugby who played their Heineken Cup tie a day later than planned in an empty stadium. The clubs need the crowds to get the money to play the players but without the players the crowds don't show up. Clubs cant bitch about having to play 4 games in 10 days in this period when they postpone games that could be played for reasons other than the safety of the pitch which then get rearranged at times when competitions are reaching their climax- a massive reason for not having a winter break. If you can play the game do- fans will make to games if they can and follow it on the media if they cant. If they slip and fall outside a ground in the summer or spring, in the dry they are more likely to sue than right now because bizarrely most people know that snow and ice are slippy and are prepared for it. Treat fans like adults and they'll act responsibly especially the kids. 

TWTWTW- Chickens Fry Fat Man

So how was it for ye in the football world. This week started and ended with the tradition poultry backlash against overweight Englishmen and the fallout. So fat Sam follows honest Chris in being forced out after a less than stellar performance in the midday game on sky- please let it happen again with DelBoy Redknapp- and all hell breaks out. For the LMA it was an outrage that these foreigners came in and got rid of a honest salt of the earth manager who could be England's next chief. Sky rolled out its expert Tony Gale-clubs managed none- in saying they hadnt a clue about good English football and now Graham Taylor is boycotting poultry in protest. First of all Graham-contributions to the beautiful game, John Barnes by accident; the same as his contributions to Italian social anarchy- if you are as much of a patriot as you claim, boycott Venkys and buy Bernard Matthews - claim it to be in memoriam- and secondly having heard the interview with the lovely lady from India's leading experts in Calcutta Fried Chicken, it would appear that they kinda prefer a tikki-takka style to a Peter Kay have it aerial bombardment and anyway its not as if Blackburn have been any good at it recently. They lost on Sunday to Bolton who while keeping a core of Fat Sam's team have moved to a more passing style-anyone who's seen the recent goals by Elmander and especially Mark Davies will say that they are pleasing on the eye under Owen Coyle- and yet even managed to outdo BB when it came to a route one goal. Thus, as a something to have i your arsenal route one is perfectly fine but when it's all you've got, ultimately it's limited and as a long term practice, Venkys were well within their rights to question whether or not it was a long term solution.
So lets take a look at fat Sam's record and its not as good as he would let you believe. he's won titles in 1992  with Limerick FC and Notts County and got promotion with Bolton but what is left out is that he appears to be far from having a natural home at real Madrid or inter more capable in the lower levels of the English game where his no-nonsense rough and tumble style is much more effective. When given the reins at Newkie, he failed by having no concept of having to build a squad with players not trying to rehabilitate themselves, a support who are too cold to want to watch volleyball and a tradition that was based on goals AND entertainment. Indeed, looking back at Bolton, its as if this season having a manger who believes in a passing  game and in their ability to play it, some of the team have seemed rejuvenated free of the shackles of the Fat Sam Philosophy ie Elmander and K Davies.
Ultimately, though the issue is whether an owner can pick their manager. The LMA can bitch and moan but as Ashley proved the previous week, they have bog all say in the matter and unlike Ashley, Venky's argument that they dont like Fat Sam- no, i dont like the fuck even before it took him a week and a prod from Ginsoak to get upset over nothing- style and dont want their team to play that way anymore

Briefly, so tevez wants out. Better people than me report that he's really just a favela boy who misses his girls so it's probably true but it may well be that this about Kia Jorobcian falling out with Man City: The Scum bet the Arse but neither looked great but at least you know united will try to shoot at the end of a move: The Wenger Boy's get a lesson in the craft as Barce will show them how it should be done and the door; last week marcotti and cascarino said on ITV that Milan were out of form; 9 points clear at the top of serie a and facing Delboys Spurs hopefully smugness will be wiped off their faces.

Here are a few good links

Daniel Taylor explains the fallings-out at Cieth
http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/blog/2010/dec/15/carlos-tevez-row-manchester-city

Further to our rant about offside screwing defenders, a fantastic article on how to really screw them
http://www.zonalmarking.net/2010/12/15/offside-goal/#more-5401

A brief summary of the troubles facing galway football

http://www.wsc.co.uk/content/view/6141/38/

5 simple rules for dating my game

Right where do we begin? It's the first posting of a new blog but one upon which I can write and which is always going to throw up reasons to argue. Good honest debate is always good and we aim to provide enough scope for reasoned debate- who the fuck are we kidding, when it comes to football reasoned debate is bollox, it's all about the passion and there are no neutrals, anyone who says that they are is missing the point.
anyway we'll start with 5 simple changes to the game which we believe would make it a better game for all. These are not massive reconstruction of the soul things just basic shit that would save frustration, anger and the sensibilities of referees mothers so here goes

1-If He's Not Interfering With Play Why Is He On The Pitch? 

The current offside rule takes the piss. It comes down to the notion of interfering with play and those in favour of it always go on about the benefit of the doubt being given to the attacker. What that means in reality is that if a defender does what he's supposed to and a forward doesnt but he doesnt touch the ball, fuck the defender. As a defender i find that shit and as a coach i find that infuriating because it assumes that a forward can only interfere if he is directly involved in play. This in it's simplest form means that if a player is offside on the left wing but the move happens on the right no offside irrespective of how far ahead of play he is. And that takes the piss because it has an inherrent hypocrisy built into it. Should it be a defender that is that far out of position on the other side of the pitch, then he plays everyone onside, which is the ultimate definition of interfering with play.
To keep the rule has it is implies that defenders must only regard what is in front of them but if the line pushes up to take into account a straying forward, why punish them for what is good defensive play and reward a mistake by the attacking team? Therefore remove the interfering with play and simply say if you're ahead of the last defender it's offside irrespective of where you are on the pitch. It wont end mistakes but it should reward good defence.

2- It's A Game Played With The Feet

During the Arse/Scum game, there was a penalty that Shrek blazed over the bar which in and of itself is mildly amusing but the penalty raised the issue of handball. Now from this perspective, it appeared as if Clichy slipped and nani hit the ball off his hand, certainly not scooping it as the lino indicated. Now depending on which pair of lenses one is wearing, it was either a fair call or a bloody appaling decision. For us it seemed harsh given some calls which have not been called but it did hit the defenders arm and thus by the letter of the law it's a penalty. The problem is tha the law itself has stabbed itself in the foot by introducing an element of doubt into the equation. It really shouldnt matter if it's ball to hand or not. It should always be the way that if the ball strikes the hand so that the ball deviates in its path, then its handball. The deliberate nature of the act should only be taken into account when deciding the fate of the perpetrator.

3- Its All A Waste Of Time

In all the furoré over Real Madrid's deliberate booking scam in the CL, what was lost was that both second bookings were for time wasting. Now in this extreme case two players were sent off but in the normal runof events, what benefit arises for the non-offending team from penalising time wasting? if anything the process of booking a player wastes more time and allows the offending team to keep the ball. So why not give an indirect freekick as well as booking the player. It would certainly speed up kickouts and throw-ins but unfortunatly wouldnt get rid of the standing by the cornerflag but one thing at a time

4 - You Cant Run Through The Guy

Although we believe that good defence is an integral to team as great attack, wea renot blind to commona failings amongst defenders such as shirt pulling and grabbing and pushing in the box but we feel these remain unpunished due to bollocklessness by refs rather than non-existent rules. However, one thing that we admit to doing ourselves which we would love to see go is the notion that if a defender makes himself big he can prevent an attacker getting to a ball heading to the endline by simply existing. Bull. Shielding the ball involves fooling an opponent by distracting them from the run of the ball not doing an impression of the Spartans at Thermopylae. It's obstruction and should be an indirect freekick as much for lack of bloody invention as anything else


5- Fall for One and All for None

According to FIFA a topless man inflames a crowd-not untrue but out of context. Likewise jumping into your own fans inflames the crowd notwithstanding the idea that very few fans get upset if their teams score and the very act of scoring in itself inflames opposing fans and despite Jonathan Wilson's thesis, FIFA wont ban goals, yet. But fans often chant 'same old "insert geographical euphemism" always cheating' and one of the reasons is diving. Now, whilst it may be the case that it is individual players who have these inner ear problems, it is perceived as a collective ailment and thus maybe the way to prevent it is to import the notion - and we generally loathe the importation of ideas from other sports and will explain why in a later post- of the team foul in that after a player has been booked for diving that the next player from the same team penalised for diving should get a red card. it would certainly cut it down if not out

Anyway thats a few suggestions, whether they're viable or enforcable is another story but lets see